Author: Ayesha Khakwani
Article:
At Devil Called Love, we’re here to help you be successful in
dating and meeting new friends. It's what we do best. We want to
take this opportunity of providing you with some hints and tips
on helping you date safely, and successfully find that special
person.
You may wish to make and meet a new friend. Your main interest
may be in dating online or dating in person, you may wish to
find love and romance, perhaps the person you dream of marrying.
It could be that you wish to travel or play sport or an activity
and need a companion or other activity partner to come along.
The key to meeting new friends is to have fun, relax and enjoy.
Devil Called Love is an excellent example of a dating site
environment in which you can do these things safely and without
any pressure. If you decide to meet someone there or in the
outside world, then we feel there are some basic ideas you
should follow for your personal comfort.
Of course, we cannot take responsibility for your actions using
our services, as you are all adults, but we can offer some
advice based on our own experiences.
Okay, so what can you do to help yourself?
First you need to get replies to your emails and messages. To do
this here are some tips you may find helpful:- Think about how
your profile is written. Ensure there are NO spelling mistakes
in your My Own Words section and your emails and messages. This
is the first important rule.
Keep your description short but be completely honest. If you are
not being truthful then when you meet, you will be discovered,
if not before. Add fun and humor to your profile, and don't be
too serious at first. Don't be afraid to state who you wish to
meet and why. Most adults know the kind of person they are
attracted to, even if they are not sure why.
Tell people what you like and perhaps things you don't. Don't be
offensive though. Take your time, you can edit your profile at
any time. Change it occasionally to keep it fresh, and try to be
original. Add photos to your profile. We find that DCL members
with a photo can get anything up to 10 times the amount of
replies, in comparison with those that do not include one. Be
polite with messaging, and don’t make judgments about the length
of time to get a reply. Please don’t feel you need to block
someone just because they are too busy to chat this time. Be
cool. Keep your first email short and to the point, perhaps
humorous and interesting. Don't include too much detail at this
point, and just a few things that you have in common. Make the
email talkative and allow it to flow. Don't be too serious at
this stage or too emotional.
Do NOT include you personal details in an introduction email.
Leave that until a relationship is established, and you feel
very comfortable with the other person. Try and contact a few
people at the same time, but always those who you have matched,
not those who you have nothing in common with as they will not
welcome your contact.
Be honest and stick to the truth. It is all too easy to add
things that at this stage are not checkable. However, you may
get caught out later and ruin a fantastic friendship or romance.
Always reply quite quickly to any messages.
Don't talk about money or possessions at this time. Most people
like or love someone for who they are, not what they have. We
assume you do not want to find someone who simply wants you for
what you can provide.
Do not apply any form of pressure in an email, whether it be for
a reply or a meeting. Do not be critical of their profile or
photo. This will create a negative response. Okay, so once you
have mailed other members and are receiving their emails, then
you may wish to consider the following:-
Ensure Your Privacy is Protected
The information you supply when you register at Devil Called
Love is completely confidential. Your registration details are
kept secret from all members and under no circumstances are made
available to any third party.
No one will ever ask you for your password. They must NOT use
your contact or email details for marketing purposes. Any member
who matches you in their searches can only see what you have
told them in terms of your personal profile, nothing more.
Remember Not to include your actual email address or telephone
number in the text of your profile or in emails unless you are
sure that you would like to take your friendship further. We can
not access your emails and do not have any control on what
information you supply to another member. If someone you are in
contact with is not giving much away then perhaps you should err
on the side of caution.
Listen to Your Intuition
Often overlooked I feel. This is the thing we all use on a daily
basis and we all trust our intuition often. It’s easy to get
carried away when someone appears to be interested. Remember the
rule, if you suspect something, you are probably correct.
Trust your judgment. Listen to what you are being told. Ask many
questions. Don't give too many details away if the other person
tells you very little. If someone is being honest, they will be
happy to tell you about themselves and their lives.
A key point is to make sure that you are enjoying your online
dating. Never ever let someone pressure you. If you don't want
to explain something or provide certain details then do not. A
real friend will behave in a patient and relaxed way. After
receiving an email, sit back and think about what you are being
told, take your time and try and sense the person behind the
email. And read their profile thoroughly.
When the Time Comes
At some point you may wish to meet in person the friend you have
made. Remember the rule, you only have to meet someone if you
really want to. If you feel uncomfortable about meeting, then
don't agree to meet. Even if you have agreed, you can change
your mind whenever you like. Perhaps you need to chat for
longer, perhaps it would be better to use the phone first. Do
not give out your home number, address, or personal details
unless you are sure about the person you wish to meet.
If you do decide it's time to take your friendship a step
further, then here are some things to think about. It may save
you a great deal of time and effort: -
Ask yourself these questions:
Do you feel you know the person well? Have they answered all
your question? Are they patient, good humored and fun? Do you
trust them? Have they applied any pressure on you? Do you know
what they do for a living, and the area they live in? Do you
know about their background and family? Have you seen their
photo and have you more than one photo of them in different
situations? Have you spoken on the phone? Are you sure they have
described themselves truthfully?
If you can answer YES to these happily then maybe it is time to
meet. Only you can decide that. Think about these general dating
rules, and act upon them if you think they are a good idea :-
Tell a person close to you about the meeting. Tell them where
you are going, when you are meeting them, where the meeting will
take place, what time you will be returning. Give a person close
to you as much information as you can. If you have a mobile
phone or are close to a pay phone then perhaps call to say you
are fine and that everything is great.
Agree to meet in a public place first. Perhaps a restaurant or
bar or somewhere where there are plenty of other people. Agree
to meet somewhere that you know, in familiar surroundings where
you can relax and enjoy the meeting. You could arrange to have
other friends in the same place but at a distance, so you feel
more relaxed. Do not agree to be collected from work or home,
and make your own way there and home on the first occasion.
Perhaps get a friend to take you there and collect you
afterwards.
Restrict the time of the first meeting. Perhaps a lunch hour or
a short time after work. This is useful if you decide that the
situation is not favorable and you need to leave. If at any
point you wish to leave then do so. Do not feel obliged to stay
and find yourself feeling awkward. If you do not feel relaxed
then you will not enjoy the date. You owe it to yourself to feel
happy and relaxed, and it is possible that it may take a few
meetings with different people before you find that special
person.
Long Distance Relationships
Online Dating through sites like Devil Called Love means that
you can easily meet people from all over the world. This is a
fantastic way of dating and perhaps very soon you may find
yourself emotionally involved with someone who lives a long way
away. Perhaps that may be part of the attraction even. However
you should try and be practical. If the person lives overseas
then ask yourself the question as to are you serious that you
will travel a long way to see that person? If you do travel and
find yourself more than happy, then how easy will it be to keep
up the relationship? If you are content with this situation, and
you decide to meet then there are some other things you may wish
to consider:
ALWAYS stay in a hotel you have arranged yourself, and never
stay at their accommodation, however generous. This will allow
you both to feel less pressure, to relax into the situation and
find some common ground. You may have both made promises in mail
or on the phone that may be harder to keep once a meeting has
occurred. If possible, arrange the hotel in a secure area of the
city you are visiting, and arrange the hotel yourself. It's
always easier to escape a date that's not going well, when not
staying with them.
Provide the details of your hotel and travel arrangements to a
best friend at home, and make an arrangement to contact them
when you arrive, after you have met your new friend and when you
are returning. Take a mobile phone if possible and keep in
contact. Always be cautious if in any doubt, and never be
uncomfortable about changing your mind and returning home at any
time should the situation cause you any concern.
The Bottom Line
The bottom line? Be yourself and enjoy your dating. We know that
online dating can be great fun, safe and immensely enjoyable. We
have found that as long as the basic precautions are followed,
then it is possible to travel locally, or indeed, anywhere in
the world to meet a special partner or make new friends.
The beauty of dating online is that the whole world is open to
allow you to meet fantastic new people. Just use a little
intuition and common sense. We hope you don't mind us offering
some basic tips and wish you every success.
About the author:
This article gives you complete information about
your all problems regarding dating.
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